Tuesday, 6 January 2015

January blues

I hate seasons. How they change, how the leaves change, how they change us. I suffer from extreme anxiety, and other 'issues'. These months don't help. It's January, I work in retail, the hype of Christmas has just passed and now we are onto the hype of sale time. Why do people come out ? Do they have nothing better to do? Most people went back to work yesterday (being the 5th) so now we have to endure the cold silent months from January to mid April. Then the summer comes and everyone seems in a lighter mood. But that's still a good 5 months away. I should be happy at the minute, I have just been promoted (yay) but that means I have lost my right hand lady to another promotion, so I'm left with staffing issues. I'm 23, this is my life. 

It's dark when I get home, and cold. My bills are extortionate due to living in such an overly priced town, I have put on weight like no tomorrow, and I'm losing sleep because I keep having panic attacks at 3 in the morning. Then the summer comes, and pretty girls are wearing pretty dresses, showing of their slim figures and their pretty tanned bodies. I'll be pale, freckled, snotty nose due to hayfever, and probably 3 stone heavier than I am now, because I have motivation to make a difference in my life. I do yoga. I stretch. I duck. I relax. For a whole 35 minutes a day. Although even saying that I don't! We aren't trained to switch off, we aren't trained to be like that. January blues are getting to me. Someone help! 

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